Exploring friendship …

Well, what’s closeness of friendship? This line of thought took me back a couple of years when I was visiting Belgaum on an official trip. I had reached Belgaum early in the morning and was checking into the hotel, when I spotted the telephone register lying there. On impulse, I checked up for the name Toro, got excited on finding a number listed against the name (blessed is the guy who thought of having entries in telephone registers on last name basis) and dialed …..

Mind has its own flashback mechanism that no director can emulate. It was a rainy June evening, when a bright, smart looking boy joined our school bus “gang”. A brief introduction later, I found this boy with his father come visiting, later on at night, the same day. His father, in the army, was on deputation to the local NCC unit and had got an accommodation close to ours. My broken English was enough to break the language barrier and we were on level playing field, literally that is. From the very next day onwards, there were “triangular” Benson & Hedges series featuring Australia, Newzealand and India, held between the two of us. The venue alternated between Melbourne (the space within our house compound) and Eden Gardens (the open space outside his). Except for the torrential Kerala rains, nothing could break our daily trysts with the gentleman’s game. The rains ensured that we knew each other’s family quite well, for these interludes, usually long, meant some indoor activity or the other. Well, a year just flew by. The second year was less “hectic”, with many parallel friendships getting established, the focal point being this newcomer, who had an intrinsic “pull” quality, but then the bonding between families strengthened, more so given the fact that the family structure, with the match in age, order and gender of the children. The deputation of Mr. Toro came to a close, it was time for them to move on, and on the day they left, a little boy realized how fleeting, attachments like close friendships can be.

The initial flurry of letters and greeting cards soon became a trickle. However, in the intervening period of a few years, both of us religiously sent one another the wedding cards of our sisters, to which both of us dutifully responded with long letters. It was in Bangalore that we met, after about 10 years, and then the pull of the Information Technology sector took him away to the US, while I came to know that his parents were based in Belgaum. The promises of keeping in touch over media like e-mails were never been kept by either party. And then, this unexpected trip to Belgaum happened.

Thank God, the receiver went off hook at the other end, and a lady’s voice “Kaun hai”? Recognition, on giving the reference of name and place, was instantaneous and his mother literally forced me to visit them almost immediately. Having breakfast and talking to her as if the intervening gap of 15 long years never happened, I was getting overwhelmed by the flood of memories. But, being on an official trip, I had to take leave without meeting his father, who had gone on a typical retired life morning jaunt. However, I did compensate by returning early in the evening, and could spend some good quality time with him too.

My friend in the US has been oblivious to this little episode that got played out at his hometown. Needless to say, my “friend” and I have still not gotten in touch, and it has been close to 5 years now. I wonder, we were so “close” then, now, we may not be, but that did not stop the “closeness” I felt when I visited his parents, a couple of years back. Meanwhile, I am looking forward to my next Belgaum trip, or maybe, the story will have its own set of twists and turns.

I am still left wondering as to what “closeness” of friendship means …………